This is part III in a series written by Dr. Ellis Orozco regarding mental health. See Part I and Part II for further reading.
Growing up my family attended a Baptist Church. It was the tumultuous times of the 1960s and ’70s. My church was a wonderful place to grow up. The people were kind and caring. I felt nurtured emotionally as well as spiritually.
If our family had some struggle (like the death of a loved one or cancer) the church was there for us. However, if something “shameful” happened in our family (like depression or suicide), we would never tell our church family.
There is a stigma surrounding mental health issues that continues to paralyze the church from being salt and light; a balm of healing for those who need it. Jesus told his critics that he came for those who are sick and need a doctor (Luke 5:31).
The Church, as the body and reflection of Christ, should be a hospital for sick people.
Yet, only 27 percent of churches have established plans to help families affected by mental illness. Almost two-thirds of Christians with depression said they wanted their churches to speak openly about mental illness, but only 66 percent of pastors reported they spoke to their church on the topic once a year or less (all statistics are from a 2014 Lifeway survey).
Tragically, the Lifeway survey also found that one-third of suicide victims were attending church before their death, but few pastors or church-members knew of their struggle.
We can do better. We must do better.
Five Things to Remember
If you or someone you love are struggling with mental health issues, here are five things to remember.
#1 It’s OK to not be okay.
Give yourself permission to not be perfect. Denial gets you nowhere.
There was only one perfect person in human history, and there are three things to remember about him.
- He too had problems, struggles, and enemies.
- He was perfect only because he came from God.
- You’re not him.
Jesus told his disciples, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33b).
We all have struggles and yours is no more “shameful” than mine.
#2 Don’t believe everything you think.
Mental illness has a way of sending your brain terrible messages that are simply not true.
Jesus said, “I am the way and the truth and the life” (John 14:6). Jesus proclaims the only truth about you. Listen to him.
Jesus calls you the beloved child of God (John 16:26) with a brilliant future in Christ (John 14:1-6). Listen to him.
#3 You deserve to get help.
Jesus loved you so much that he was willing to die for you. You are important and you are loved.
You may feel that you are a burden or that people are tired of you, or that no one believes you when you tell them that you are in pain, but remember that Jesus hears your every cry. He has proclaimed (from the cross) that you are of infinite worth to God.
We all need help at one time or another. You deserve the very best help available. Let people help you!
In addition, don’t feel ashamed to get the medicinal help you need. You would never tell someone with cancer, diabetes, or heart disease to “just get over it” and to not bother with seeking medical help.
Depression and suicidal ideation are the product of a disease that is just as real and deadly as cancer, diabetes or heart disease. So, why would you deny yourself the medical help you need?
#4 Work to be happy. Perfection is a delusion.
I need to lose 30 pounds to get to the perfect weight for my height and body type. I may have to be happy with losing 10 pounds. I may never lose 30 pounds. That’s okay.
Perfection is a delusion. Getting healthy and staying healthy is hard work and a never-ending goal. We never arrive. Sometimes it’s okay to just feel okay.
#5 Be grateful every day.
It’s more difficult to be consumed with your struggles when you are focused on all the reasons you are blessed. Make a list. Keep a “Blessings Journal” to document all the good things that are happening in your life.
Find a reason to be grateful.
Most of all, be grateful that you can go to Jesus every day. He never gets tired of hearing from you and he will never leave you alone. Nothing can separate you from his love (Rom. 8:38-39).
This insight was written by Dr. Ellis Orozco, the Public Theologian in Residence at Stark College & Seminary. Dr. Orozco served in ministry as a pastor for 30 years and is the founder and CEO of Karooso Ministries.
Visit Dr. Orozco’s Blog to read more.